Sugar and Snark
by ABrighterDarkness
Summary: Few things are coincidental when Tony Stark is involved. A compilation of one-shots.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note**

**This was written for starnobella during Hermione's Haven #OfftheBeatenPath19.**

**A HUGE thank you to the lovely Frumpologist for Alpha/Betaing this little story.**

**Prompt:**

**Hermione and Character A arrive at the same time and are told they were both booked for the same room. Either one or both of them can leave with a full refund. It's late at night and both Character A and Hermione are dead tired and about ready to collapse. Character A suggests they both just share the room for the night and sort things out in the morning.**

**I hope that you enjoy!**

**Always,**

**ABD**

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**Lucky Us**

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"Wait, wait, hang on just a second! You mean to tell me that not only is the suite I _paid for_ unavailable but you also managed to double book the backup room as well?"

Tony was tired. Exhausted, really. That wasn't even considering the hole currently being glared into the side of his head. He would have been less tired after spending three straight days in the lab running on caffeine and his own genius. Instead, he was insistently reminded as to why he preferred to leave the business side of Stark Industries to Pepper. She would be lucky to talk him into another trip for a _very_ long time after this. And he'd only just arrived. Even if the location was more pleasure than business. Hawaii never got old. Maybe he should just buy a property here before he went back to New York.

"It does appear that way, Mister Stark," the attendant sighed apologetically, interrupting Tony's internal monologue. "I am unsure how this mistake was made but we are, unfortunately, in our peak season so there are no other room availabilities to rebook either of you."

"We shouldn't have to rebook at all," huffed the petite woman standing beside Tony, fingers tapping irritably on the counter that separated them from the attendant. He eyed her wild curls and exhausted, but clearly annoyed, expression. He smirked inwardly when he heard her mutter, "I knew this trip was going to be a mistake."

"I do apologize, Ms. Granger. We can offer either or both of you a full refund on your reservation as well as reach out to other nearby establishments to verify their availability."

"This suite…it _is_ a suite, correct?" Tony clarified.

"Yes sir," the attendant nervously confirmed. "We have you in the Rainbow Tower suites. I believe that it will suit your needs."

"Look, Granger," Tony started, raising his hands in front of him in a conciliatory gesture when the woman's eyes jumped from the man behind the counter and narrowed suspiciously. "It's after midnight, and you might've heard that I have low patience on a good day. Accept your refund, we split the room and get some rest and we'll talk to the man in charge in the morning to get this fixed." At her doubtful expression, Tony rolled his eyes dramatically. "We're adults right? We can share a room peacefully." When her expression didn't change he sighed, "Okay, _fine_. You're an adult and I'm me. But it's late and I'm tired. Can we go now?"

The woman pursed her lips and seemed as though she was gearing up to argue before her body sagged tiredly. "Fine," she groused before turning her irritation back to the attendant. "I expect that the room is appropriately stocked to adequately compensate for this oversight?"

The younger man appeared surprised and nervously swallowed, "Yes, Ms Granger." With a quick nod from both perspective guests, he quickly worked through the check in process and passed the key cards across the counter.

"How do they manage to double up on a weeklong reservation? For two high-paying guests." She asked rhetorically as the elevator doors closed around them and began its ascent.

"No clue," Tony absently shrugged as he eyed the illuminated floor numbers. "Just our lucky day."

"Lucky us." She smirked with a sarcastic edge before pushing off of where she had leaned casually against the elevator wall to exit as the door retracted open. "You grabbed the cards, right?" She called over her shoulder as he followed her to their door.

He brushed slightly against her back as he reached around her small frame to swipe the key card into the scanner. Tony smirked when he felt her stiffen and then turned the lever handle and pushed the door inwards. A hand on her lower back urged her forward into the room and Tony turned to close and lock the door.

"Tony!" Hermione glared, swatting his chest sharply once he turned from securing the door.

"Her-_ow!_-mione," Tony laughed, stumbling backwards into the door in an attempt to escape her hands.

"What are you _doing_ here?"

Tony deftly caught one of her flying hands in his own, fingers curling around her wrist, and tugged her into him before wrapping both his arms around her in hope of calming the attack. "I'll have you know that I'm here on _business_. Pepper-Approved business and everything."

Hermione snorted inelegantly and arched a brow in mild disbelief. "Few things are coincidental when you're involved Tony Stark. Did you hack in and double book us intentionally?"

"No, I didn't," he asserted without trying to hide his smug smirk.

Hermione rolled her eyes and pushed roughly off his chest to turn and examine their suite. "Of course you didn't. You just as likely had your AI hack the reservations."

"Oh come on now, I wouldn't do that," Tony insisted but then paused and tilted his head cockily to the side. "But even if I did, would you really complain about that?"

Her answer came in the form of a frustrated growl and a small body colliding with his, legs tightly winding around his waist and fingers digging into his hair to pull his lips to hers. Admittedly, it took a very brief moment for his mind and body to register the sudden motion but his own hands quickly ghosted over her thighs to brace under her ass for support. Tony turned to press her against the wall beside the door before diving fully into the kiss.

When she broke for air, Tony quickly descended over her jaw and throat, exhaling harshly in response to a sharp tug of his hair. "I'm still angry with you," she bit out through a moan as he latched onto the sensitive spot just below her ear.

"Mmhm," he responded distractedly against her throat.

"Furious, really," she insisted, reflexively tightening her thighs and rocking her hips against him, drawing sounds from both of them.

"Furious, check." Tony nodded as Hermione used her hold in his hair to tug him back up to kiss her.

He shifted his weight to hold her in place as his right hand slipped upwards to pull on the length of fabric that tied her dress together at the left side of her waist. Tony eased them backwards just long enough to let the dress fall from her form, barely allowing her time to shrug the clinging fabric from her arms before pressing her roughly back against the wall.

"I'm going to-I'm still going to hex you," Hermione continued between kisses, her fingers diligently working the buttons of his shirt and shoving the fabric over his shoulders. Her hands eagerly relearning the displayed skin.

"Got all week to come up with the perfect one," Tony answered, the hand bracing her ass moved forward to slip beneath the damp, lacy fabric covering her core. His fingertips circled the sensitive nub causing her to shudder against him. When he sunk his index finger into her, he felt tugging on his belt and then his pants before they dropped to his ankles. Suddenly, he was reminded that he wasn't the only impatient one.

In a frenzy, Tony managed to gather just enough focus to tear away the lacy annoyance just as she shifted to shove his boxers down over his hips. Her nails dug into his shoulders as he sunk himself inside of her. It was rough and eager just as it seemed to be nearly every time they were together. That they hadn't even made it past the door was an indication of their mutual eagerness.

Tony was relieved when her body began tightening around him, knowing that he wasn't far off either. Her head fell back against the wall as her body arched against his, a gasping moan muffled against his kiss echoed his own as she pulled him over with her. As they both came down from their highs, she kissed him lazily without the previous urgency and Tony allowed the familiar, soothing affection to ground him.

Eventually, Tony loosened his firm hold on her hips as she unwrapped her legs from around his waist and lowered her down his body until her feet were on the floor. He was very conscious of his clothes around his ankles, held in place by his shoes that were still on his feet when he shuffled backwards a step to allow her a small amount of space between his body and the wall. With a familiar sweet smile that Tony knew only belonged to him, Hermione reached a hand to cup his scruffy face, running her thumb gently over his cheekbone. Rising up onto her toes, she kissed him gently before dropping back down, her lips twisting from the tender smile to a smug smirk to rival his own.

She carefully shifted to the side to remove herself from where she had been crowded into the wall, her fingertips dragging across his abdomen as she moved. Just as she stepped around him, hyper aware of his gaze following her, brown eyes flicked up to his mischievously. Her fingernails ghosted sharply over the skin at his side that she _knew_ to be ticklish.

Tony yelped and awkwardly attempted to move away from her fingers only to remember the clothes around his ankles when he found the hard floor against his back having tripped over the tangled clothing in an attempt to escape the tickling.

"Not fair," he griped petulantly at her giggles, shifting from his position on the floor to kick off his shoes and attempt to detangle himself from this clothing. Distracted by the naked witch rummaging through her bag for her sleepwear, it took him several tries to extract himself.

"I never claimed to be fair, Tony," Hermione yawned, her earlier exhaustion washing over her as she pulled a soft, well-worn t-shirt over her head. "Besides, you deserve it."

After digging out and putting on a clean pair of boxers, Tony dropped himself onto the bed, sprawling comfortably across the left side. He had been tempted to take the right, knowing that it was her preferred side but he wasn't completely blind to the dark glare the witch had sent that told him that she knew exactly what he was thinking. He was already due a hex, apparently. Tony was sure he'd have other opportunities to earn more. Especially since he had no intention of letting the hotel fix their reservations.

Tony watched as she extinguished the lights and climbed into the bed. When she laid down as far as she could get on the opposite side, her back to him, he scoffed unnecessarily loudly and dragged her across the expansive mattress, ignoring the surprised and irritable _"Tony!"_, until her back was fitted closely against his chest. He pressed a soft kiss into the juncture of her neck and shoulder when she wiggled herself in closer and laced her fingers with the hand he had wrapped snuggly around her waist. He could hear the content affection in her sleepy voice as she whispered a soft good night.

She'd be angry, he thought, stifling his amusement against her shoulder. Oh yeah, she'd definitely be angry if he made sure that the reservations couldn't be fixed. She would no doubt know that he was responsible for that, too. He was alright with that though. Because he was unashamed to admit that Angry-Hermione was his favorite Hermione. Because Angry-Hermione…well Angry-Hermione was a passionate witch and Tony Stark took entirely too much pleasure out of pushing her buttons just the right way.

Thankfully for him, he was just obnoxious and impulsive enough and she loved him just enough to ensure that she wouldn't storm off and avoid him either. As was evident from their earlier tryst against the hotel room wall.

Tony honestly had no idea what had happened to their original reservations. For once, _he_ hadn't done anything to encourage this stroke of luck. He might send a gift basket to whoever made the mistake though.

_Shit_, he thought with a groan when he remembered his actual purpose for being in Hawaii to begin with.

Business. Pepper-Approved and everything.

Determined to ignore anything resembling responsibility for as long as he possibly could, Tony tightened his hold on the soundly sleeping witch and allowed his own exhaustion to take over.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:**

**This lovely fic was written for The Melting Pot's Christmas in July 19 fest.**

**The prompt consisted of Hermione/Tony, Sparta, Greece, and Skydiving.**

**For the record, I have never been skydiving and the closest I've been to Athens or Sparta is Souda Bay some ten years ago. So I really hope that I did it justice!**

**I hope that you enjoy!**

**Always,**

**ABD**

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Worth It

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She had been curled up on her couch in her small but comfortable London flat enjoying a rare quiet evening to herself when her phone buzzed on the table beside her. Considering that very few people utilized the muggle technology and even fewer contacted her so late in the evenings, it was easy for her to determine the identity of the caller without needing to spare a glance at the screen.

"Hello, Tony."

_"Have you checked your email today?"_ came the abrupt voice through the small speaker.

"I'm well, Tony, thank you for asking," she teased with a laugh, unable to take offense at the man's typical behavior as she moved to settle herself into the chair at her desk and began to open her email in response to his prompting.

_"Yes, yes…okay fine. Hello, Hermione, how are you? Good? Great. Now, have you checked your email?"_

"I'm checking now, just give me a moment," Hermione bit back another quiet laugh.

_"It wouldn't take this long if you'd just let me outfit your apartment,"_ Tony grumbled.

"So you've said, but my flat is just fine as it is," she insisted, opening the unread email file. "Tony. What is this? Greece?"

_"Yup. We leave in two days. A short stop into Athens and then on to Laconia. Just us with no need to rely on booking errors."_

"Errors, right," Hermione snorted. She still wasn't sure that she fully believed that Tony hadn't been responsible for _that_ small mess. "I don't know, Tony. This is very short notice."

_"Look, it's already booked. So all you have to do is pack. Remember it's just us, so keep that in mind while you pack."_

Hermione could hear the teasing smirk in his voice and rolled her eyes though, admittedly, it was more affectionate than it was irritable. "I've also got to be able to let the Minister know, Tony. I can't just drop everything and go like you can."

_"Hermione. I know you have time off on the books and your boss isn't gonna tell you no. It's Greece. Laconia? Does Sparta ring a bell? Just get packed, and I'll be there on Saturday."_

She tapped the fingers of her free hand thoughtfully on the desk as she mentally debated with herself. That man really did know her buttons entirely too well. "Okay, fine, Tony. I'll send Kingsley an owl, and I'll see you on Saturday then."

_"That's my girl. So about that apartment of yours-"_

"_No_, Tony."

_"Oh come on…"_

%%

History was fascinating. It was capable of teaching so very much if one was patient enough to listen to the lessons it taught. Admittedly, much of the history was romanticized in the modern retelling. True, there was nothing romantic about war though no matter the century it was fought. But there was more to any culture, ancient or otherwise, than merely the wars they won or lost. It was that something more that had Hermione Granger so very excited for the opportunity to visit the remains of the ancient city Sparta, Greece.

She had always wanted to travel more, but following her own decidedly unromantic war, Hermione had known that she was needed to help pick up the pieces and rebuild their fractured society. So she had done what Hermione Granger did best and threw herself into the task in its entirety. It was utter exhaustion heaped onto an already diminished and exhausted young witch.

But they prevailed. Even though it had taken nearly a decade of endless uphill battles and countless breakdowns on her part, Magical Britain had regained a mostly steady, albeit scarred, footing. And just like after every battle, every war in the history of humanity…life went on. Diplomacy succeeded and failed. Families came together and fell apart. The scars were still there. Mentally and physically. They were far from being 'wonderful' or even 'great', but they were finally able to claim that, as a whole, they were doing alright.

It wasn't until just over four years ago that she was able to begin traveling at all, though most of that travel was for international diplomacy matters through her liaison position within the Ministry, most often to MACUSA. It was on one such trip three years ago that she had happened upon Tony Stark…and had _not_ been impressed with the snarky, self-important businessman. For nearly a year after that, it seemed that every trip she took, she would somehow find herself dealing with the man again and again. The man was persistent; she would give him that. In the end, his unique brand of impetuous charm wore her down…she still wasn't entirely sure when or how, though she had long since given up fighting her thoughts on the matter.

A week in Hawaii together certainly did wonders for their relationship…even though it was _supposed_ to be a solo, self-indulgent retreat.

But Greece? There was so much to see! So much history to learn.

Though, granted, never in her life did she expect the "short stop," they would be taking would involve seeing Athens from _ten thousand_ feet in the air.

"Tony, no. I'm not doing this. Absolutely not. You're officially _insane_." Hermione insisted, sliding as far away from the man as she possibly could and clinging to the edge of the seat beneath her.

"Oh come on," Tony laughed, a grin on his obnoxious face that she was sure she would hex the moment her feet were back on solid ground. "I'm not just throwing you out of the plane. It'll be fun."

"No, you're throwing me out of the plane attached to you with a flimsy piece of fabric to _hopefully_ slow us down!" She returned, voice turning shrill as her anxiety peaked.

"Okay, okay, stop and breathe," Tony said, scrambling to push her shoulders forward until she was hunched over herself. "Now listen, alright? We're jumping tandem, yes. You see this right here?" Tony carefully took her hand and pressed her fingertips over the watch-like device attached to his wrist. When her head tilted his direction to stare at him wearily, he smiled and squeezed her hand. "In the unlikely event that something _does_ go wrong, we've got back up right here. This is the safest skydiving trip you could have."

The indication was given that it was time for them to get ready and Hermione groaned. "I can_not_ believe I'm letting you talk me into this Tony Stark."

"I know, I know, terrible person," Tony agreed far too cheerfully. He carefully ensured that she was adequately geared and the guide double checked their harness to ensure Hermione that _yes_ Tony did know what he was doing.

And then they were falling.

Hermione could vaguely hear Tony's happy laughter and then nothing but the sound of rushing winds in her ear as her mind scrambled with panic.

Hermione squeezed her outstretched fingers tightly through Tony's, and he squeezed back insistently. Gathering her courage, she slowly opened her eyes behind the thick plastic goggles.

Oh.

Oh _wow_.

She felt utterly breathless for an entirely different reason. Her overwhelming sense of fear, forgotten for just a moment. The _view_! Dear Merlin no wonder the men in her life loved being in the air so much if _this_ is what they saw! She felt a burst of surprisingly joyous laughter escape her, unheard through the rush, but the squeeze of her hands told her that Tony had at likely felt the vibration against his chest.

Hermione wasn't quite sure how to keep time during their descent, but after a short time of enjoying the gorgeous view she felt Tony squeeze and then detangle his hands from hers, and she shrieked at the feel of the sudden jolt of the being pulled upright with parachute deploying above them.

Despite more than two decades worth of friendship with Harry and Ron encouraging her to fly, not to mention one thestral and one dragon flight, Hermione had never taken to the air the way the nearly every man she knew had hoped. But…this? Hermione took a moment to absorb the beautiful view of Greece stretching out below and before her and felt little more than awe.

"What do you think?" Tony asked, just over her shoulder.

"Tony…" She said, voice displaying her wonderment. "This is…this is _beautiful_."

"Not so bad, huh?" He teased, though his tone was softer than his usual mocking cadence.

Hermione shook her head and smiled, "I don't think I'll be jumping on my own or with anyone else any time soon, but no, this isn't so bad."

"I thought you said I was insane?"

"You are," she laughed with an awkward shrug against her harness. "But I trust you."

"Well, just pick the next view you want to see like this and let me know."

%%

The pair had landed smoothly enough, and Tony couldn't help but grin at the beaming smile Hermione wore as they made their way back to the car that awaited to take them into Laconia. Before he could usher her into the vehicle, Hermione had kissed him tenderly and smiled that familiar sweet smile, "Thank you, Tony."

"Go on," he said, unable to quell his own affectionate grin before sliding into the car next to her. Despite her abundant eagerness to see everything, his witch spent the majority of the two and a half hour drive from Athens to historic Sparta with her head on his shoulder and arms curled snuggly around the one of his she leaned against, sound asleep.

Adrenaline Crash.

It was only lunchtime when they reached their final destination, a small, rented villa not too far from the sites that he knew she would want to visit. He didn't suspect that they would be utilizing a car all that much, but he had planned for a private rental for the remainder of their stay anyway. Tony carefully nudged Hermione awake and offered a hand to help her out of the car before accepting their bags from the driver with a nod of thanks.

"This is lovely, Tony," the witch murmured, voice still groggy from her nap.

"I figure we get things settled in and then find some lunch?" He suggested, hand on the small of her back as he guided her towards the house.

Tony wasn't nearly as fascinated with the historical aspects of the trip. His nature was to be purely forward facing. But he could also understand her perspective of learning from history. After all, hadn't he learned from his own? At one point he had worn the mantle of "Merchant of Death" with smug, belligerent pride. A name that was now an ever-present shadow in the back of his mind. There was little doubt that there were still caches of his weapons hidden in locations around the world. Someday he would be able to neutralize them all before anyone else got hurt. Hopefully.

He also knew with little doubt that had he _not_ learned that lesson; he definitely wouldn't be exploring the ancient ruins of Sparta, Greece with the fiery Hermione Granger. There would have been nothing he could have done to change her mind about him had he not changed his methods and his ways even if hiking was _also_ not his favorite hobby. This was worth the sacrifice.

So while he wasn't awestruck by the ruins, he could appreciate her fascination with history. Besides, he already got to share his love of flying with her, sort of. It was only fair that he indulge in her desire to do the same.

Tony followed with fond amusement when Hermione pulled him into the Archeological Museum on their third day, easily allowing the witch to pull him by the hand or their linked arms from exhibit to exhibit. It was a good time. Despite technically being his idea to bring her there, he surprised himself with how much he was enjoying it.

As they worked their way past a display of armor and helmets, Tony tugged her hand to pull her back beside him. Before she could formulate a question, he nodded towards the display with a smirk, "We should find Cap a set like this, he'd fit right in."

Hermione laughed and shook her head, "No, he would be mortified!"

"That's the fun of it! Besides, it's not like his current get up leaves much more to the imagination," Tony pointed out.

She tilted her head to the side in slight agreement and laughed again, "That may be true but…you know what, I know better than to debate this one with you. Poor Steve would be the one stuck dealing with the fallout."

Tony smirked and turned on his heel to face her, "Just for that, I might do it anyway."

"Oh, leave him be, Tony," she said with a smile as she pushed him playfully.

"You never let me have any fun," he replied with a mock pout.

"Oh?" Her smile shifted to a teasing smirk. "I'll remember that for later."

"I'll tell you what. I'll leave Cap and old Greek armor alone," Tony said slyly.

"But?" Hermione prompted, eyes narrowed slightly.

"You let me fix your apartment when we get back."

"Tony…"

"No, no, just listen."

"Okay, state your case," she sighed.

"Let's walk," he said, leading them to continue their way through the museum. Staying still for any length of time had never been Tony's strong suit. "You would never have to worry about slow tech again. Everything you need, want, or desire in an instant."

"I don't mind being patient," she shrugged.

"It would be a lot easier to check your email," Tony pointed out.

Hermione stopped walking once again and tilted her head up, eyes narrowing speculatively, as she studied him curiously. "We've had these conversations before, Tony. What's this really about?"

Tony sighed and turned his gaze to the exhibit nearest to avoid her focus for a moment. "It's about you and me living very public lives. Me especially. That kind of publicity, no matter the reason, is automatically a potential danger. Better security is always a smart idea, and right now, you have none."

Hermione was quiet for a moment before tilting her head to the side, "So this has more to do with protection than simply slow tech."

"Protection. Peace of mind," Tony shrugged almost dismissively. As though the conversation was little more than banal chatter.

Her expression softened in understanding, "Okay, Tony."

"Okay?" He repeated, blankly. "Okay as in…?" Tony spotted the familiar sweet smile and an odd tension released in his chest. Taking that as his answer, he eagerly shifted their focus to something...less. "I'm hungry. Are you hungry? Let's go find dinner."

Hermione ended up talking him into a picnic since the sun would still be up for a few more hours.

Tony was still picking away at the surprising variety of food that she had packed when Hermione finished, and he watched appreciatively as she stretched out on her back over the blanket they had used to cover the ground to enjoy the evening sun. It didn't take long for him to decide to join her.

Eventually, her head came to rest on his chest with his arm curved around her back with his hand settled at her waist as they watched the sky begin to change colors.

"Tony?" Her voice was soft and thoughtful.

"Hmm?"

"You know I love you too, right?"

Tony swallowed thickly and let out a nervous sigh as quietly as he could. She was always able to read what he didn't say from what he had. "I know."

After a few moments of silence, Hermione spoke up again. "Tony?"

"Hermione?"

"When did you figure out how to get the suit schematics into your watch? I knew you were working on it, but I hadn't realized that you'd figured it out."

"Oh. Ah, right," Tony paused and grimaced. "I'm still working on that."

There was a beat of silence.

"Tony!" Before he could react, small fingers were teasing into his sides, and he tried to bite back the reflexive laughter. He wasn't very successful, and the witch quickly used her advantage to straddle his hips to gain better access to the ticklish points, her delighted laughter echoing his own. Just before the laughter started to become painful, Tony planted his feet and lifted his hips enough to knock her off balance. Hermione quickly braced her hands onto the blanket on either side of his head as they both attempted to catch their breath.

"It was worth it, though, right?" Tony prompted with a smirk, his hands resting at her waist, thumbs dragging over her ribs.

"It was. The whole trip has been," Hermione smiled softly. With a slight shrug, she added, "It always is with you, though."

"Good." He tugged lightly at her waist, and she ceded to his urging, and their lips weren't used for anything remotely conversational until well after the sun had fully set.


End file.
